New Mom, Who Dis? Season 1, Episode 6
Hey Moms! Did you give your kid the GIFT OF LIFE, only to get a macaroni necklace in return? Kids, Dads, Partners, Spouses… you need to STEP UP YOUR MOTHER’S DAY GIFT GAME. And I’m going to help you.
I held a Mother’s Day focus group with REAL moms to find out what they actually want this Mother’s Day. Spoiler alert: NOT FLOWERS.
During my important research, I unveil some of the worst gifts moms have ever received:
A rope necklace with poop emojis on it.
An invitation to hike.
NOTHING.
FYI – never get nothing.
Look, we know it can be misleading when we smile with gratitude, but here’s the TRUTH: the higher the pitch of our voices when we say ‘I LOVE ITTT!’ the more we kind of hate it.
Here are some suggestions from real moms… how about a massage BY A PROFESSIONAL? A Mommy and Daddy playdate? Heck, even a playdate alone with wine and a couple of episodes of Real Housewives will work. We don’t want flowers, ‘punny’ wine glasses, or anything with the word ‘MOM’ written on it.
And if you are a panic-shop-on-Amazon-the-week-of-Mothers-Day kind of partner, no judgement- may I suggest a Lumnee Phone Case to spruce up our selfies, a work of literature called ‘Porn For New Moms’ or an Amazon Echo, so we can talk to someone who will actually listen.
Watch me bring out my inner Oprah in this episode of New Mom, Who Dis? And let’s give MOMS THE LOVE, but most importantly, the MATERIAL OBJECTS they deserve this Mother’s Day!